Insidious is blind inception
What's reality with all these questions
Feels like I missed my alarm and slept in
Slept in
Broken legs, but I chase perfection
These walls are my blank expression
My mind is a home I'm trapped in
And it's lonely inside this mansion
Yo, my mind is a house with walls,
covered in lyrics
They're all over the place,
there's songs in the mirrors
Written all over the floors, all over the chairs
And you get the uncut version of life
when I go downstairs
That's where I write when I'm in a bad place
and need to release
And let out the version of NF
you don't wanna see
I put holes in the walls
with both of my fists 'til they bleed
You might get a glimpse of how I cope
with all this anger in me
Physically abused,
now that's the room that I don't wanna be in
That picture ain't blurry at all,
I just don't wanna see it
And these walls ain't blank,
I just think I don't wanna see 'em
But why not? I'm in here,
so I might as well read 'em
I gotta thank you for this anger
that I carry around
Wish I could take a match
and burn this whole room to the ground
Matter of fact,
I think I'ma burn this room right now
Somehow, this memory,
for some reason, just won't...
You used to put me in the corner,
so you could see the fear in my eyes
Then took me downstairs and beat me
till I screamed and I cried
Congratu lations,
you'll always have a room in my mind
But I'ma keep the door shut
and lock the lyrics inside
Insidious is blind inception
What's reality with all these questions
Feels like I missed my alarm and slept in
Slept in
Broken legs, but I chase perfection
These walls are my blank expression
My mind is a home I'm trapped in
And it's lonely inside this mansion
inside this ...
Yo, my mind is a house with walls,
covered in pain
See, my problem is, I don't fix things,
I just try to repaint
Cover 'em up, like it never happened,
say, "I wish I could change"
Are you confused?
Come upstairs and I'll show you what I mean
This room's full of regrets,
it just keeps getting fuller, it seems
The moment I walk into
it's the same moment that I wanna leave
I get sick to my stomach
every time I look at these things
But it's hard to look past
when this is the room where I sleep
I look around, one of the worst things
I wrote on these walls
Was the moment I realized
that I was losing my mom
One of the first things I wrote was,
"I wish I woulda called"
But I should just stop now,
we ain't got enough room in this song
And I regret the fact
that I struggled trying to find who I am
And I lie to myself and say
I do the best that I can
Shrug it off like it ain't nothing,
like it's out of my hands
Then get ticked off whenever I see it
affecting my plans
And I regret watchin' these trust issues
eat me alive
And at the rate I'm goin',
they'll probably still be there when I die
Congratulations,
you'll always have a room in my mind
The question is,
will I ever clean the walls off in time?
Insidious is blind inception
What's reality with all these questions
Feels like I missed my alarm and slept in
Slept in
Broken legs, but I chase perfection
These walls are my blank expression
My mind is a home I'm trapped in
And it's lonely inside this mansion
inside this ...
So this part of my house,
no one's been in it for years
I built a safe room
and I don't let no one in there
'Cause if I do,
there's a chance that they might disappear
And not come back, and I admit,
I am emotionally scared
To let anyone inside,
so I just leave my doors locked
You might get other doors
to open up, but this door's not
'Cause I don't want you
to have the opportunity to hurt me
And I'll be the only person
that I can blame when you desert me
I'm barricaded inside, so stop watchin'
I'm not coming to the door,
so stop knockin', stop knockin'
I'm trapped here,
God keeps saying I'm not locked in
I chose this, I am lost in my own conscience
I know that shuttin' the world out
ain't solvin' the problem
But I didn't build this house
because I thought it would solve 'em
I built it because I thought
that it was safer in there
But it's not, I'm not the only thing
that's livin' in here
Fear came to my house years ago,
I let him in
Maybe that's the problem, 'cause
I've been dealing with this ever since
I thought that he would leave,
but it's obvious, he never did
He must have picked a room
and got comfortable and settled in
Now I'm in a position,
it's either sit here and let 'em win
Or put him back outside where he came from,
but I never can
'Cause in order to do that,
I'd have to open the doors
Is that me or the fear talking?